Hey, Responsible Adults!
There’s an Instagram trend called #IntroduceYourself where folks reveal random personal details to their followers. In the spirit of participation, I thought it would be fun to share a few facts about me that you never asked (or needed) to know.
You’re welcome.
I’m a Taurean with Sagittarius rising and moon, making me slow to change but quick to party. A monogamous life partner but fearful of commitment. Down-to-earth but sometimes flaky. Financially prudent but self-serving in the name of fashion. Measured and self-reflective but superficial and discursive—when spilling Real Housewives tea.
I can’t drive. Correction: I can hill start, weirdly enough but I have no depth perception or concept of speed. This means I think every vehicle going in the opposite direction is about to mow me down, even though I just ran three red lights.
You see, I actually passed my driver’s theory, took the requisite lessons and applied for my driver’s test but was politely advised by my instructor not to ever go on the road without practising first in a parking lot. I never really needed a license while living in cities, until I moved to the suburbs and then developed Parkinson’s. Just when I could, I couldn’t. The universe can be a little sh*t stirrer sometimes.
When God was giving out sporting genes, I was trading track & field for style & deportment. Priorities.
I have zero sporting ability or interest. None. Zilch. Nada. At six feet tall, I am the human equivalent of ‘failure to launch’. I was held back in guppy lessons when learning to swim. I was put in the slow runners’ group in elementary school. When I moved to Ireland, my mother made me try out for the basketball team where I spent most all of my time warming the bench as a ‘reserve’. Why? I have the coordination of a baby giraffe in stilettos. Even in yoga class, my instructor joked that she would write L and R at the top of my mat to help me out. Full disclosure: I was tempted to do it myself. So, not an athlete. Nope. Not even close.
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